Love Letters To My Departed Daughter
by obsessivelyfanaticgw09
Summary: Mrs. Lovett lost her daughter and was left with nothing but a lonely, broken heart. How can something like that be healed? Perhaps…it's time again for Mrs. Lovett to just take matters into her own hands. Part 2 of 5 in Love Letters Series.
1. August 19th

**Oh hello loves!**

**If you're just joining us here in the Love Letters series, check out my profile for Love Letters To My Unborn Child, the first part. Or I guess you could just keep reading and be reallllyyy confused *shrug* maybe you want to. **

**To everyone else.**

**I'm so sorry that this is AN ENTIRE 24 HOURS LATE! Their was a huge storm in my town and, living in a very wooded area, the tress surrounding my neighborhood decided to very kindly fall…on our power and cable lines. So….now I'm at my moms house where the trees were a lot nicer! So that's my excuse…**

**Still shouting out to the lovers of Name! ImmortalDarkPassion and Junior Pirate!**

**Now thanks for Love Letters!**

**Black Diamond07- "Great angst!" I love it! People should use that word more often…Thanks!**

**Sheila Chiaroscura- Wowy thanks! That first quote you liked was actually what my friend contributed without knowing. She'll be happy to know you liked it XD **

**xX-LadypersoN-Xx - …Hope you like the cookies! **

**Samantha Eleanor Lestrange - Why thank you love. Hope you think the next parts are as awesome as this one!**

**Lovely - Awwww. You made me cry too =) I'm so glad you liked the story so much!**

**Sweenylovett101- Thanks for the 10 love! Sorry you almost died! Don't forget to e-mail meeeeee! **

**Burma- Well thanks new reader! I always love to see the people who read all of the story in one sitting! XD**

**Enjoy the beginning of part two!**

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><p><strong>August 19<strong>**th**

Not writing anything was killing me.

I know it sounds odd and foolish, but it's true.

I've gotten over the worst of it, I suppose. The worst of the depression. The worst of the tears. The worst of that awful feeling in the pit of my stomach that I can't do anything to fix the situation I somehow find myself in. The worst of the sitting in the parlor and staring at the wall for hours and hours on end. It's all I was doing before I picked up this old notebook.

It's empty, as in, not the same notebook I _was _using.

I know I'd said I would burn it. But clutching it over the fire, the flames almost licking my skin, I couldn't simply let the only bit I ever had of my daughter turn to embers like I didn't care at all? I don't want to forget about you…just forget about what _happened _to you.

Is that too much to ask?

Anyway, I can't very well call these love letters to my unborn child anymore …can I?

Hm…

Then…love letters to my departed daughter…as much as it hurts to write to you and know you'll never see it, it hurts more to think that you simply wouldn't of cared how I feel.

So much has happened and I wish you were just here to help me through it!

So, what drags me to this notebook?

I'm not positive…except for someone to talk to…cause the days are longer and darker and lonelier without the sound of footsteps up above my head…

So I'll write these letters, still, to you, cause sometimes I can still hear you.

Every time I hear a child cry, every time I hear an innocent laugh.

And sometimes I can still feel you.

Every time the wind tickles my hair against my face, like it's your tiny fingers. And every tear that falls might just be you…crying for your mum.

Instead of your mum crying for you.

Love letters to my departed daughter.

Departed, but still here somehow…

My heart can't simply just let you go, now can it?

No matter how much I miss you…and how often I cry over your grave that doesn't exist…like you never even existed…

Ugh!

I hate sitting here and just writing about how horrible life is - just wallowing in utter pity.

It's been three months and eight days now since I lost you.

And it's been ten days now since Mr. Barker walked out of my life.

Well…not walked out…more like was forcefully _driven _out…and then Lucy…and Johanna now with that horrible man. I want to take back every horrible thing that I've ever wished upon that woman…it seemed to have all been misdirected to the man I love…I don't really want to think about it all, truthfully.

Oh, goodness…I gotta get out of this hell hole…

I'm sick of waking up every morning to this empty room and this hollow shop and the haunting stairs up to where the Barker's used to reside.

I'm tiered of walking around the shop every morning to see yet another rainy sky and yet another customerless day.

The emptiness inside me burns through all of me, consuming all of me. I feel it like a fire in my heart.

I had so much love to give…

It's that hollow hole that you left when you never came back in that midwife's arms. It's dug deeper and deeper every time I go to sleep and I see that in my dreams - it plays over and over again, as if it's you, wanting me to remember you forever.

The scars are fresh and ruby covered! Deep, and…

…all in my head…

And the only reason they're even still here is because day in and day out this bloody place brings thoughts of you back and jabs into the wounds deeper.

Goodness, I've got to get out of here!

I'm so sick and tiered of all of this!

I can't bloody stand it!

Seeing your tiny body in every shadow or bundle of sheets on my bed.

Hearing you cry, always in the next room over - always _just _out of reach.

Desiring you to be in that empty cradle every morning when I wake up. And for that one swift moment before I open my eyes, when I think you _could _actually be there, before reality catches up harshly and fast, .

Wanting you here.

Needing you here.

I can't bloody stand it!

So that's it then!

That's the final straw.

Goodbye Fleet Street!

Goodbye London!

Goodbye the shadows and crying and empty cradle, I leave you all behind!

I pack tonight, I leave tonight, that's it!

Finally, the light at the end of the tunnel.

Nothing has a hold on me here anymore, nothing is tied to my bloody ankles keeping me down…I don't care where I end up, I just want out.

Goodbye and good riddance!

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><p><strong>Well look at it this way! Since I updated late, you only have to wait six days for the next chapter!<strong>

**And there's actually only two chapters to this part! So the next part will be the last!**

**I so very much love your reviews!**


	2. September17th

**Happy you guys found the new story! XD**

**Here's my usual thanks!**

**Samantha Eleanor Lestrange - I'm so glad you're glad! And thanks you!**

**Sheila Chiaroscura - Thanks again, my wonderful quoter! I'm glad it's as awesome as the first one, I hope it stays that way!**

**Lovely - Haha! Makes me smile to hear you checked the site so many times! Lol. And dang them typos! That's what I get for not using my editor. Oh wellllll…**

**XDazedandConfusedX - Why thanks again, love! Glad you're as excited as I am!**

**Burma - "Wonderfully written yet terribly depressing" Well I got what I was aiming for! XD And I know what you mean, I tried to read Harry Potter fanfics and there SO MANY!**

**Sweenylovett101 - Thank you for reviewing even though I read it to you XD That's all you're getting though!**

**Thanks toooo Sheila Chiaroscura and Sweenylovett101 for favoriting part two and I love Mark Cohen for alerting it!**

**One quick thanks to XDazedandConfusedX for reviewing my new one-shot, My Beautiful Broken Savior! **

**And lets get on with it!**

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><p><strong>September 17<strong>**th**

So here is where I find myself.

I moved out the next day. I grabbed all my closest belongings and all the money I've been saving since childhood and locked that door of the pie shop for the last time. I didn't have the thought to do anything with the shop but leave it. Who's to say that this isn't simply going to be an extended vacation anyway, eh?

And I traveled and traveled, in this direction then that direction…I'm not even positive I'll be able to find my way back if I ever _do_ decide to.

Well, now that I'm here, I just don't want to leave!

I found an inexpensive little sea-side cottage that's just perfect for me. It's only got three rooms: a kitchen, bedroom, and parlor.

I'm just renting it, you see. I've only met the landlords once, they live clear across town.

It's so charming to be here! Just the décor seems to make life a little cheerer.

You step up the stones to the door and walk in to the parlor, complete with nice chairs and a little table for tea. The whole place is furnished by the landlords! Lucky me. And the kitchen is open and on the far left wall. Simple, with a fireplace, an oven, some shelves, and a small table. A bar stool sits at the end of the tall table and looks out a large window, displaying the most brilliant view of the beach and the sea. The walls are all painted a wonderful, bright green color (my favorite, mind you) and the large window lets in so much light, that I don't ever need to even light candles. Even after the sun goes down, the moon reflecting off the water outside beams into the room, making everything seem surreal and peaceful.

To the right are two doors, one to the only bedroom, and the other to another building. The landlords say they'd be happy to rent out the shop if I thought I'd need it. I think I'm going to take them up on the offer so I can start a business there. I'm still deciding what I should do to provide for myself. I've considered selling beach-side pies. Perhaps not all meat here - perhaps branch into the fruits and the pastries! Or, you know? I've always fancied opening up my own dress shop. I have gotten compliments on the dark and delicately designed dresses that I wear. Not many people know I make those myself. Wouldn't that be smashing?

I guess I'll still have to wait and see what this new life brings me.

I don't know why I didn't move here sooner!

You would have really loved it here darling.

Twould be even more perfect for the two of us. Sometimes that bedroom just seems a little too big for just me…

Anyway, I never knew that living down by the sea would be so perfect for me! Living in London all my life has corrupted me into seeing things like they are all inside a little box. This place, all of his here? It opens me. Makes me feel free and as though life is worth living.

One of my favorite things to do, is to get up early in the morning, before the sun rises, and before the beach in back of my rented home is covered with weekend trippers and locals. I get up and just go out and sit in the sand. I love the feeling of the moist sand under my fingertips, as I dig my nails in deeper. I love to feel the fresh morning wind gust against my cheeks and curl through my hair. It blows the salty sea water up and sprinkles my face, making me feel refreshed. And then, just when I think things couldn't get any more perfect, the sun begins to rise. Purple and pink splay the horizon, and it takes my breath away…

Well, it isn't all fun and games, I suppose.

I didn't leave London with much, and that includes money…

But…like I mentioned, I'll find a way to get money coming in regular like again. And it's ever so easy to get by with simply myself to provide for…

Hm…

So, there's this family that I see everyday…

They must be local, and every day for the past month, they gather on the beach in back of my little rented space and play together as a family.

I watch them.

There's a mum, a father, and four children.

The mum is always with the four kids, while, I'm guessing, the father works, for I only see him on weekends.

I sit at this tiny table and watch them for so long, that I know almost everything about them.

The mum has beautiful, bright orange hair that she loves to let flow freely in the ocean breeze. She's a tiny little slip of a thing, with a petite, tan, face.

She loves her kids very much…I see it in her eyes, her smiles, the way she plays with them, the way she cares everyday. She can't be much older then myself, all her children seem fairly young.

The eldest, Amelia, I've heard her been called, looks to be around seven years old. She has her mums shining orange hair and smile. She enjoys most climbing on the rocks that line the left of the area the children are told to stay in. I've seen her been scolded more then once for playing just beyond those rocks.

The next two, twins I believe, can't be much older then four or five. The boy is called Flynn, while the girls name, I think, is Melinda. Both of them have short, brown-red hair that reminds me of how I've always wanted my hair to be like. An auburn color, my mum used to describe it. These two are inseparable. Everything they do, they do together. From building sand castles, to going for a swim with Mum.

Then…there's the baby.

Can't be more then a few months, if I know right. Her mum wraps her in cute pink bundles to keep her soft skin from turning red in the sun.

I always wanted to wrap you in cute little pink bundles…

This babe, whose name I'm not certain of, spends most of her time sleeping in her carriage under the shade of the large tree to the right of where the kids play. Mum brings her out every once and a while, but I don't think she really likes the sun and water much. Quiet little thing she is! I've never once heard her whine or cry, even when Mummy drags her into the hot sun. Silent, but oh so darling…and cherished.

Oh…

There the family is now, minus the father, with their picnic baskets full of their usual lunch, five sandwiches and five apples (two green for the twins only). The mum pushes the carriage, with difficulty, across the sand. Amelia shares in the labor by dragging the picnic baskets across the hot ground into the shade. The two middle kids aren't hesitant to jump into the water…and now their big sister has joined.

Mum laughs as the three splash each other.

The smile on her face makes me sick.

I have so much love to give…

How…how is it fair? That this woman gets _four beautiful, wonderful, peaceful, healthy _children…and I can't even have one.

What did I ever do to deserve this?

It doesn't seem fair!

I…have so much love to give…

I look up from my writings again now…it hurts to look at them…but I do.

Hm…seems as though little Amelia has hurt her leg running around on the rocks…again.

Mum rushes to the aid of her crying child with the twins trailing behind.

Oh…

She leaves the carriage behind.

No one is around the baby.

…no one is watching her…

No…one is…looking…

I'll…

I'll be back in a tick…

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><p>I…<p>

I hold you now.

You're so tiny - so perfect…as you sleep in my arms…so quiet…so trusting.

Ella…I finally hold you!

Tears are pouring over my cheeks with the happiness that shocks my heart.

Just to feel the weight of you beneath my arm right now as I write this.

I never thought I'd get to!

God, you're gorgeous…you take my breath away…even more then the sun rise early in the morning.

You're so peaceful…so wonderful. Sleeping…I can't even explain how elegant you are because…you take my words away from me!

I can't help but giggle at the happiness - the pure, utter, heart-stopping, bliss.

All wrapped up in your little pink bundles, like I always wanted, like I always planned.

Ella Elizabeth Lovett.

The best thing that's ever happened to me.

The most wonderful thing, here, sleeping before my eyes.

I reach up and move a piece of hair that covers your soft forehead…

Oh! It wakes you up!

"Hello Ella…" I can't help but say aloud, the tears almost clouding my whispering speech.

Oh…your eyes. They're so brilliant! As blue as the sky when the sun caresses it on a cloudless day.

You don't even cry - you're as peaceful as ever.

In fact, I can even see your lips slide up as you smile back up at me.

I'm breathless…

With the smile aching my cheeks, I go back to the window which out of I first saw you.

They haven't even noticed yet…

They haven't even noticed that you're gone - that the carriage is empty…

I throw one more glance around the entire beach for someone sounding an alarm…

But no…not yet.

And I pull closed the thick red curtains…just in case.

You're mine now.

It's only fair…

You're Ella Elizabeth Lovett and you are my, flawless, beautiful, brilliant, daughter.

Whom I love very much…and always will.

And no one will ever know…

No one will ever know…

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><p><strong>Few random notes here! <strong>

**One, it says in the Sweeney Todd script, that after the pie shop and such have become successful, Mrs. Lovett dyes her hair. Some people say that her hair looks that auburn color the whole movie, but, the way I play it, it's only that after they get the money and she chooses to dye it. **

**Just sayin…**

**Oh yeah! And all the kids names kinda go alone with my obsessions. **

**Amelia - Doctor Who**

**Flynn - Tangled**

**Melinda - Ghost Whisperer**

**See? Fun fact!**

**Again, I'm starting part three now, so it will be in a different story. If this messes stuff up for you guys, let me know, and I can rearrange it to all be in one story, if I really gotta. **

**The third part is called Love Letters To Remember. It will be about eleven chapters long, how about some info to keep you hanging?**

**Well…an old friend of Nellie's comes back, Nellie finds a new love interest, Ella grows up from a baby to a three year old to an eight year old to a thirteen year old… someone dies, there's a cat, Amelia comes back, Nellie lies about Ella's past, and Ella has horrible night terrors!**

**Yay!**

**And I decided that at the end of the chapter I would announce (or not) that now I've written more and there will FIVE parts, instead of just three. **

**It never ends! **

**XD**

**See you next week loves, be lookin out!**


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